I want to write this carefully, because my intention is never to hurt others, unless it’s the people who tried to ruin my life in 2019! And this is NOT to one specific person, but to lots. So, if you feel picked on, just know ya’ll started it and I’m finishing it. I feel like I have been treading lightly with people’s feelings over the past month, and that is NOT the job of the bride! The bride should be allowed to feel how she wants to feel, and want whatever she wants, without worrying about others. Not to the point of being a bitch, but still! Most women go into their wedding day with the thought that this will be their ONLY wedding day! And most have an idea in their head of what they want! Why can’t people just be supportive of that?
Do you know what I have found throughout this wedding process? Very few people care what the bride thinks. Most of the people that I have interacted with in this process have an agenda. They want to judge me for my ideas. They laugh and make fun of me because I want things a certain way. Or they hear that wedding planning isn’t something that I particularly enjoy, and so they equate that with being incapable. And so they feel the need to control things. I was discussing my ideas with someone, and they had the nerve to say ‘See? You can do it!’ in the most condescending tone I’ve ever heard in my life. Of course, I can do it! I’m not a child! I am not incapable of anything. Just because I don’t want anything grand, and I think flowers are stupid, and am letting my bridesmaids choose their dresses, does NOT mean that I am incapable of planning my wedding! It means I have very specific ideas of what I want. It means there are certain details that I care about and others less so. I’m so tired of hearing what other people think! Why does no one care what I think?
It is very true that I am the girl who, instead of planning her wedding since she was five, planned on building a library in her house. And I’m STILL planning on that! But Jerrad and I agreed to a wedding, and so that is what we are doing. One of the reasons I was so hesitant to agree is because I knew there would be drama. Weddings bring out of worst in everyone. No one comes off looking well. So far, I have asked two people to step out of my wedding. One was a friend of Jerrad and I, who we had asked to coordinate some things, and be a little bit of a mediator. Instead of mediating, she ended up causing a lot of problems! The other was a bridesmaid. I’ve known this girl since college, and she has always been a little bit extra. But when I asked her to be a bridesmaid, her extra was amplified beyond what was acceptable. She demanded that I accommodate her, and insisted that it was important for her to look good…’even if I didn’t care how I looked’. I’m sorry, did you just say I’m going to be an ugly bride because I refuse to spend more than twenty minutes on hair and makeup? Yeah, you can stay home. How do people have the nerve to come at the bride with this much attitude? I don’t understand!
People LOVE to criticize. And they love to mock others. Southern women are great at it because they do that whole passive aggressive thing…’Awe, bless your heart.’ This really means ‘You’re stupid, and everything you’re doing is stupid.’ But I’m supposed to believe this person cares and wants to help? I’ll take my chances doing it my way, thanks. You want to know why women prefer to stay single? Because the drama isn’t worth it. Nothing is worth this nonsense. And the number of people who have said, ‘Well, I was a bride. So, I know.’ No, you know what YOU wanted. And you had your day. So, back off mine. Back off my registry, back off my location, and back off the fact that nothing is going your way! It isn’t supposed to! It’s supposed to go MY way!
I understand that most women love weddings. They are cute, and fun. There is kissing and romance! But a wedding is ONE DAY! I am more concerned about being a wife. I am more concerned about creating a strong marriage. What is one day, compared to the rest of my life with the man I love? So, if you TRULY want to be helpful, just do what I ask you to do! Be on my side, and stop telling me every choice I make is stupid or wrong. Stop making fun of me, and laughing at me. Just! STOP! Your opinion truly doesn’t matter. Your acceptance and approval really doesn’t matter! Trust me when I say, Jerrad and I have the most supportive Maid of Honor and Pastor in the world. And both will beat you in the name of Jesus, if ya’ll can’t get it together.
Oh, in case you wondered, Jerrad does know I wrote this. It was his idea. He is just as frustrated as I am.
The OK Adventures of Peppersloth and Annie 
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